How Donald Trump Can Set You Free: A Guide to Liberation From Our Noble Leader

Donald Trump, the man, the myth, the hair. As he gears up for another run at the presidency, many are wringing their hands, shaking their heads, and wondering how we got here. But perhaps, instead of despair, we should see this as an opportunity for liberation. Yes, you heard that right—liberation. Trump can set you free in more ways than you ever imagined.

1. Realize the Absurdity of It All

Why stress about that not-so-nice boss of yours? Take a step back and look at our leaders in politics, business, film, arts, and media. They're not exactly paragons of kindness and virtue. So why are you busting your chops to uphold some ideal of greatness? Life is absurd, my friend. The pursuit of success, the grind to be the best—why bother? Take a page out of Trump's playbook: just chill out. Enjoy your life, enjoy your family. You don’t have to be great. You don’t have to be better. Self-improvement? Overrated.

2. Embrace the Chaos

In a world where Trump thrives, it’s clear that chaos reigns supreme. The more chaotic, the better. Why organize your life meticulously, stress over every detail, or try to control the uncontrollable? Embrace the chaos, because that’s where the magic happens—or at least, where you realize that trying to impose order on a world that thrives on disorder is a fool's errand. Let go, and let chaos take the wheel. Who knows? You might find yourself enjoying the ride more than you expected.

3. Ditch the Illusion of Meritocracy

Let’s be honest: meritocracy is a myth. We like to think that hard work and talent will get us ahead, but Trump’s rise to power should make it abundantly clear that the world doesn’t work that way. Connections, bravado, and a certain disregard for the truth often get you further than talent ever could. So stop believing in the fairy tale of meritocracy. Instead, focus on what really matters: enjoying your life, making connections, and realizing that the system is rigged—so why play by its rules?

4. See the Power of Shamelessness

Shamelessness is liberating. Trump’s career has been a masterclass in how to wield shamelessness like a weapon. Lied? Deny it. Caught in a scandal? Double down. Criticized? Attack back harder. It’s freeing to realize that the burden of shame is optional. Why should you carry the weight of guilt or worry about what others think? Take a cue from Trump and live shamelessly. You’ll find that when you stop caring about others’ opinions, the world suddenly feels a lot lighter.

5. Discover the Futility of Facts

Trump’s relationship with facts is, to put it mildly, tenuous. But that’s liberating in itself. In a world where facts are subjective and reality is up for debate, why stress about getting things right? Facts are flexible, opinions are king, and reality is whatever you want it to be. Stop worrying about being factual, accurate, or informed. Instead, focus on crafting your own narrative. After all, if Trump can do it, why can’t you?

6. Break Free from People-Pleasing

Trump has never been a people-pleaser, and look where it’s gotten him. Trying to please everyone is exhausting and, frankly, impossible. So why try? Stop bending over backward to make others happy. Whether it’s your boss, your friends, or society at large, let go of the need for approval. Be unapologetically yourself, even if that means ruffling a few feathers. The freedom you’ll find in not caring what others think is truly liberating.

7. Recognize the Power of Confidence

Confidence, whether deserved or not, can take you far. Trump’s unshakeable self-belief has carried him through controversies, scandals, and near-impossible odds. Why not adopt a little of that unearned confidence for yourself? Even if you’re not the smartest or most qualified, acting like you are can sometimes be just as effective. Confidence can be the key to unlocking opportunities you never thought possible, simply because you believed you deserved them.

8. Revel in the Irrelevance of Truth

Truth, as Trump has shown, is more about perception than reality. If enough people believe something, does it even matter if it’s true? This realization can set you free from the endless quest for truth and the anxiety that comes with it. Why stress about finding the truth in a world where perception is reality? Instead, focus on shaping your own narrative and letting the “truth” be whatever you need it to be in the moment.

9. Appreciate the Art of Distraction

Trump is a master of distraction, shifting focus from one controversy to the next before anyone can catch their breath. This is a powerful tool in a world overloaded with information and stress. Learn the art of distraction for yourself. When life gets overwhelming, don’t tackle the issues head-on—distract yourself, move on, and let the storm pass. You’ll find that most problems aren’t worth the energy we give them, and a little distraction can go a long way.

10. Celebrate the Freedom of Ignorance

They say ignorance is bliss, and Trump’s tenure has certainly given that phrase new meaning. The less you know, the less you worry. Why burden yourself with too much information, especially when most of it is unpleasant? Instead, embrace the freedom that comes with not knowing, not caring, and not overthinking. Sometimes, ignorance really is bliss.

In the end, Trump’s return to the political stage is a reminder that we live in a world that’s unpredictable, chaotic, and often downright absurd. But instead of letting that drag you down, let it set you free. Free from the pressure to be great, free from the stress of self-improvement, and free from the need to be anything other than what you are. Because if Donald Trump can be president, then truly, anything is possible. So why not enjoy the ride?