The Death of Virtue in the Age of Success: How Neoliberalism Gave Us Narcissistic Heroes
In today’s world, success seems to have taken on a twisted definition. We’re told to look up to people who, by traditional standards, would be far from admirable. CEOs, entrepreneurs, politicians, and TV personalities who exhibit traits like narcissism, arrogance, deception, and selfishness now reign supreme. These individuals, equipped with inflated egos, ruthlessness, and a penchant for self-promotion, have become the figureheads of our modern society. And this isn’t just by accident—it’s a byproduct of a capitalist system amplified by the neoliberal assault on our values.
For decades, neoliberalism has championed unfettered markets, deregulation, and the reduction of social safety nets, creating a world where the loudest and most self-serving voices thrive. We see the impact of this everywhere, from corporate boardrooms to social media platforms, where deception, manipulation, and ego are rewarded more than compassion, honesty, or generosity. Are we to believe that these once-treasured traits are now redundant?
Replacing Integrity with Noise
The problem runs deep. In our pursuit of growth, speed, and attention, qualities like kindness, humility, and integrity have been quietly shoved aside. Instead, our society has replaced them with louder, shinier, and more marketable alternatives. The more attention one can grab, the more "successful" they appear, even if their success is built on a foundation of deceit. Social media platforms and their clickbait algorithms have only fueled this trend. To get noticed, you need to be louder, more arrogant, more controversial. In such a landscape, how can a person with true integrity—one who values honesty, kindness, and generosity—hope to succeed?
Take a glance at those who have captured the public’s imagination in recent years: figures like Donald Trump, Elon Musk, Jordan Peterson, David Goggins, and Joe Rogan. These so-called anti-heroes seem to thrive by shouting the loudest, riling up audiences, and crafting punchy headlines. Their magnetism lies in their ability to provoke and polarize, not in any commitment to truth or moral virtue. And yet, these are the people our young generations look up to.
What Are We Really Teaching Our Children?
This raises an uncomfortable question: is there any point in teaching our children about qualities like compassion, kindness, love, and honesty? Will they find success in a world so enamored with cutthroat competition, selfishness, and greed? It seems almost naïve to believe that these noble values have a place in the modern capitalist machine. After all, the winners—the ones we pedestal as examples of triumph—seem to embody the very opposite of these virtues.
What we are really teaching our kids, knowingly or unknowingly, is that success in this world is about having, not being. It’s about owning, consuming, and outperforming others. If they don’t learn to fight tooth and nail for what they want, they risk being left behind, facing poverty, stagnation, and loneliness. This is a harrowing lesson to absorb for those who see value in living with kindness, generosity, and a sense of community.
The False Promise of "Having"
But is the path we’re walking the only way forward? Certainly, those who embody the traits of competition, selfishness, and greed may achieve wealth and material success. Yet, they may also find themselves stuck in a cycle of never-ending desire for more—more money, more fame, more validation. This is the "having" mode of existence, which traps individuals in a state of perpetual discontent. Even with their wealth, they live in scarcity: poor mental and physical health, strained relationships, and a constant need for external validation.
In contrast, the quieter virtues—love, compassion, honesty, integrity—offer something deeper, something richer. A life built on these principles may not lead to fame, fortune, or power, but it can offer something far more fulfilling: healthy relationships, inner peace, contentment, and a life of alignment with one’s true values.
We must ask ourselves: are we doing our children a disservice by teaching them to chase wealth at any cost? Or is the true disservice found in failing to teach them how to live lives of joy, connection, and purpose?
A New Way Forward
Perhaps the answer lies in finding balance. In teaching our children that success is not just about acquiring material wealth but about building a life rich in meaning. It’s about understanding that, yes, the world may reward loud voices and selfish motives, but it will always need quiet leaders who embody compassion, integrity, and kindness.
At the end of the day, it’s not about telling our children that kindness will make them rich. It’s about teaching them that these qualities will help them lead lives worth living—lives full of connection, purpose, and joy. In a world driven by superficial definitions of success, that’s the most important lesson we can impart.
Evan Sutter. Be kind.